Home. What is home? Where is home? Is it the physical building I live in? Is it the city, state, or country I am from? Is it the place I feel most at peace, and where love is unconditional? It can be defined in so many different ways, right?
Growing up, our family moved fairly often, so when people ask me where I'm from, it inevitably turns into a much longer story than they expected. I moved from Ohio to Minnesota to Florida to Colorado to Michigan. Then I went to college in Illinois, moved back to Michigan, moved back to Ohio, and finally settled in S.E. Michigan. Michigan is where I met my husband, got married, bought a house, and it's where I am raising my family.
Still, for whatever reason, I was reluctant to say Michigan was "home." I had seen and experienced many different places and somehow took pride in the fact that I didn't have any roots. I couldn't imagine living in one place longer than a few years or feeling constrained by the same surroundings day after day for a lifetime. How could one place hold my attention and my heart? I needed a change of scenery, a change of responsibilities, a change of environment; change, change, change!!
Come to find out what I really needed was a change of heart. A change of mind-set. Moving so often allowed me, even encouraged me, to harden my heart; to protect myself from the hurt and pain of leaving, I refused to get too attached. I held onto the friends and memories only long enough to get by until I made new ones. Once I left, I never looked back. Forward and onward to the next adventure!
Marriage and motherhood changed all that (for the better, of course!). To be the best wife and mother I could be, my heart had to be open and vulnerable. I had to be honest and expose all my faults and shortcomings; expecting scrutiny and rejection, but finding forgiveness and acceptance. I had to build a life which included someone else's wants, needs, hopes, and dreams. Together, we needed to build a foundation for our family and our future.
I've spent the last few days in Hong Kong and there is nothing like flying halfway around the globe to a country very much different from your own, to make you appreciate and miss home. Home in this case is all-encompassing: America, Michigan, my town, my house, my family, my bed, my food, my entire way of life. That is home to me. Cliche but true...home is where my heart is, and my heart belongs to those I love.